Computer Terms

486 - The average IQ needed to understand a PC. 

State-of-the-art - Any computer you can't afford. 

Obsolete - Any computer you own. 

Microsecond - The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete. 

G3 - Apple's new Macs that make you say "Gee, three times faster than the computer I bought for the same price a Microsecond ago." 

Syntax Error - Walking into a computer store and saying, "Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object." 

Hard Drive - The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, esp. after a Syntax Error. 

GUI - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it. (pronounced "gooey") 

Keyboard - The standard way to generate computer errors. 

Mouse - An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate. 

Floppy - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer. 

Portable Computer - A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips. 

Disk Crash - A typical computer response to any critical deadline. 

Power User - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS. 

System Update - A quick method of trashing all of your software. 

More Jokes